I have a problem. I know you are shocked, but I will tell you what it is anyway. I have a problem with customer service. It seems that no matter where I go, or who I do business with, I receive the worst customer service. Now I know there are plenty of people out there who do a fine job and that they conscientiously take care of their customers, but I find that none of these people ever help me.
I normally would not have such a problem with customer service, but I am a good customer. In fact I go out of my way to find the right person to help me so I do not waste other peoples time.
When I need help, I look for qualified people to help me because, unqualified people will act like they know even though they do not. and the whole situation will end in a fiasco. As Dirty Harry said, "A mans got to know his limitations." Meaning, if you don't know, then you need to man up and just admit it from the beginning.
I will give you a few examples of what I mean. First, A few weeks ago I was at the grocery store. I needed to buy a pastry brush (this is the little brush that looks like a paint brush, but it is for food). I went to the utensil aisle and did not see one. I went to find a grocery manager to help me. Not a bakery manager, not a produce manager and not a deli manager, but a grocery manager. After explaining to the manager what a pastry brush was (I knew I was in trouble at that point), he walked me all over the store looking for one. We ended up in the utensil aisle, where I started, he looked me right in the eye and said, " We do not sell those here."
"No Shit Sherlock!!!"
This guy could have saved so much time and energy by just admitting from the get go that he did not know and he could have checked with someone and I could have been on my way 20 minutes sooner. I do have to admit that the extra 20 min walk probably did me some good.
I know that I have probably made my point, but that example was not that funny or self-depricating so I do have a few more examples for you.
The Fat Dad and his NOT fat wife needed a bed. By this point we had been to every furniture store in town. We just could not find a bed we liked. In a last ditch effort we went to one of those, Mattress Giant, Pillow Top, Sleep Slumber Waterbed Showroom places. Again we struck out, but on our way out of the store we saw a display. On the display were about 10 examples of different metal bed frames. Each example was just a corner, and listed under each frame was a price. So we found what looked like a competent sales person and started to ask him some questions. The salesman was in his late 50's, he still had his buzz cut from the military, and he was wearing a suit.
We began by asking him about the metal bed frames and the difference in price and what that meant.
He told us that each frame was increasingly more durable, and that each carried a larger bed as well as more weight. It is what he said next that I will never forget. He looked at the FatDad and his not fat wife and said, and I quote, "Now big people like yourselves are going to want the number 7 or 8 frame."
All I remember after that was physically pushing my wife out of the store while she yelled things like, "Oh yeah!!! Well what do you and your $^% ^#%&ing Wife sleep on?" I could not get her out of the store fast enough.
Finally, I went in for surgery the other day. No it wasn't for a lap band, gastric bypass, or lobotomy like many of you guessed. It was for a rotator cuff injury, and no I did not get it from being fat. I fell on the ice. Anyway I did my research found a great doctor and clinic to go to and made my appointment. On the day of surgery my wife brought me in and I changed for surgery. I sat on the gurney and the nurse came in to go over a few things with me. Smoker? No. Drink? No. Family history of heart disease? No. Do you snore at night? No. So the nurse finished the questionnaire and she looked up and said, "So your diabetic, right?" UH!!! NO!!!. Just because I am fat that does not mean I am diabetic.
So, the FatDad struck out again.
Look I know that being in a customer service job is difficult. I do it everyday, and it seems like it never gets easier. As soon as you learn how to handle one type of customer another evolves and you have to learn how to take care of them. It is just a part of the business. But for those of you who can still use some pointers I have a few for you.
1. Do not under any circumstance ask the woman with the large belly, "How far along are you?" I do not care how old she is, how big her belly has gotten or how long you have known her. Chances are she is not pregnant and you will just end up insulting her. You can just simply ask, "What's new?" And if she wants you to know she is pregnant she will tell you.
2. Do not under any circumstance refer to the woman with your regular gentleman guest as, "your lovely wife." The reason for this is, if it is his mistress, she will want to be the wife and you will upset him. If it is his wife and she has not been there before, she will wonder who he was there with before. The end of that story never goes well. I have worked at a place where I only met the mistress and not the wife and I can assure you it is uncomfortable.
3. Do not ask you regular guest if the younger woman or man that they are with is their son or daughter. If it is not you will embarrass them by making it look like they are with a guest that is too young for them. Also if they are not old you will be implying that they are old because their friend looks that much younger then they look.
Never say anything that you cannot explain away or you would not want to have said to you. Be nice, listen, and do your job. You are not funny enough, smart enough, or fast enough to get out of calling someone, old, fat or a cheater. Keep these things to yourself, and talk about them with you significant other later at home. It makes for some great pillow talk.
No comments:
Post a Comment